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All of a sudden two decades have passed and you still have not kissed anyone with tongue, or kissed anyone at all for that matter, or had a 3 AM conversation with someone who would rather look into your eyes for ten minutes straight than talk. You have never worn a lover’s sweater or “forgotten” it at home in your bedroom just so you would have an excuse to see them again. You have never even stood face-to-face with someone who makes your hands shake so hard it feels like they’re both having a separate anxiety attack.
This causes you much guilt and self-blame and sadness but above all, an overwhelming curiosity. Are you really that ugly, that unwanted, that uninteresting, that boring, that no one, absolutely no one, has ever looked at you like the only thing on earth?
The answer is no. The better answer is that someone out there, somewhere in the world, is “wondering what it’s like to meet someone like you,” and they have two decades worth of love stored in their veins like a shoot-‘em-up drug, and they’re just about ready to inject it into someone else’s bloodstream. All you have to do is roll up your sleeves and wait for it to happen.
At times you felt so lonely you could stand at the edge of a cliff with nothing beneath you but air and grass and a long, long way down, and you’d still feel emptier than that canyon itself. Maybe you even danced with yourself alone in your room a few times, arms outstretched around a ghost, pretending someone else’s hands were on your waist, someone else’s eyes boring into yours.
Or maybe you fell temporarily in love with strangers on public transportation, fell in love with anybody who so much as accidentally brushed your hand on the way past. For you, falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return. But people are not eggs and falling in love with a dozen of them does not mean your shell will remain uncracked. One day you’re going to hit the point where you’re so desperate for human contact that you’re going to snap in half and all your love will bleed out like egg yolk.
But someone out there is eating a bowl of Ramen noodles right now, or putting on slippers, or settling into bed. They are doing all the normal things that you’ve done in your own life. They are just like you. They have cellulite and extra fat in all the wrong places and goals and fears and doubts and bad handwriting.
The truth is that they are just like you, and being just like you, they’re looking for a lover too. They’re what you might call a soulmate.
They think they’re all alone in feeling the way they do, but you’re really both two halves of a whole.
And one day you’ll meet them, bump into them on the street, and your two halves will be put together, and you’ll make one.
Writings For Winter - For Twenty Year-Olds who have never been loved 
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Apr 21, 2014 / 209,362 notes
Apr 20, 2014

I’m doing this for myself.
I will never be that girl again.

lushalla:

fresh x modern
Apr 20, 2014 / 1,919 notes

lushalla:

fresh x modern

Apr 20, 2014 / 89 notes

(via loveoflondon)

You’re really amazing, and one day, maybe very soon, you will find someone who really means the world to you and you will fall in love with them, and he will love you to bits. He won’t find anyone else like you if he could search the world forever and ever. You will find someone who won’t want to leave your side. He might not be in your life yet: he might have walked past you today, he might have walked outside your house a few hours ago, but one day, he’ll be yours and only yours forever and ever.
Apr 20, 2014 / 479 notes
Apr 20, 2014 / 1,843 notes
psychotic-torture:

sad black and white blog, I follow back similar
Apr 20, 2014 / 44,215 notes

psychotic-torture:

sad black and white blog, I follow back similar

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Apr 20, 2014 / 25,815 notes

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Apr 20, 2014 / 35,006 notes
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chalmiste:

m o r e fresh here
Apr 18, 2014 / 4,172 notes

chalmiste:

m o r e fresh here

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Apr 17, 2014 / 5,851 notes

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